I’m writing this to help you better understand the man I am and who I plan to become. Much like gum. I made a commitment to change all my bad habits and past ways.. Because I can’t lie and say it hasn’t been days when temptation almost took over, my bed was getting colder, and the devil was on my shoulder. I immediately dropped to my knees and pleaded with Allah to rid me of this disease.. This feeling of lust and breach of trust. Now, none of these other women are relevant and I never thought I’d ever say this but I think I can handle being celibate.. for you. I want our souls to stick and maintain a consistent flavor for the now and laters of our marriage. The man that I am? I’ve done plenty bad, left good women sad, manipulated situations. I’m sure angels of Allah have pen and notepad to recall my sins and situations as He continue to correct to keep me on track when the enemy kept pushing me back and didn’t give any slack. On a lighter note, let’s state some positive facts.. I’m a great man. My intentions are pure. I have goals and future plans in store for you, my family, and eventually the legacy we will create together. Who do I plan to become? A role model for our future son. Take responsibility for all things I’ve done and will do. Fulfilling all my dreams with you, travel the whole world with you by my side and to one day walk into Jannah holding your hand. Want to help you reach your dreams and goals, to be your support and foundation when things get tough. For you to let me wrap my love around your soul and open your heart for me to understand your beauty, to grow up with you to grow old with you, spending my life absorbed within your jokes and mesmerizing eyes. Since you are one of those people you only meet once in a lifetime and i dont want ever to let go of you, to want to dive in your river of kindness and drown in the beauty of your love because it gives my veins purpose. Simply i ll make sure I always tell the truth. Show you unconditional love as proof that REAL MEN are still alive and well. I’ll continue to fail in order to learn from all these mistakes. I promise to always keep a permanent smile on your face and have a backup plan just in case the enemy gets wise and tries to fill our heads with lies.
“My beloved, there’s so much I want to say, but I’ll stop here. What I have left out, I’ll make sure to add on it through actions once we’re married inshaAllah. Words are worthless if they’re not backed by actions. I know what I’ve promised sounds unfeasible, but if Muhammad (pbuh) could do it, then there’s no reason why I can’t as well bi idhinillah. All I ask, is for you to do good and abstain from evil, in order for our marriage to prosper. For now, know that I have carved out a niche in my heart, waiting for you to fill it.” ~ Strokes Of My Pen
And Allah knows best.