Forgive & Forget

Forgive and forget… What does that even mean?

Forgiving is one thing, but to forget? For me it is really out of my control. My mind forgets all kinds of things. What I ate yesterday, what I got given for my birthday by a certain person, what I was supposed to do on my break at work. I am terrible at remembering things, so forgetting for me is a given.

But forgiving is different. I feel that to forgive someone is a step to take in order to let something go, and I actually manage to do that pretty well. If it’s small then I forgive almost instantly. If it’s big then it might take a night, but normally that is it.

If however it is a family member or my bestfriend then I find it harder to forgive because I am with them and it is a struggle for me to realise that the fault is with me and not with them, or if it is with them it also takes a while to establish because we are together and can’t separate the argument to a conclusion. But normally a night can determine that, if it is left alone to establish.

However, to forget is a completely different thing. If we are asking someone to forgive and forget their argument and their anger then that is something that can be done. I know for a fact that I can never remember my anger after an argument. When looking back the anger is always humorous. I can always laugh about my anger after it has happened because it often seems ridiculous after is has happened and has been solved. But if you are asking me to forget the argument as a whole then that is a completely different matter.

Sometimes an argument can stick in your mind forever and may never be forgotten even if it is forgiven. Not even an argument, but I can remember the most pointless shit like a smell from a holiday I took with my family when I was three years old. So I’m wondering, how easy is it really to forget? Is it possible to choose to forget something because we want to, or is it down to something deeper?



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